Been Around The World And Ay-i-i-i

If you’re wondering where I am in my exciting life, I’m on the east coast. Many may say I’m in the south, but as a midwest girl, I call this the east coast. I’m in North Carolina for a while doing work (don’t ask, can’t tell). I’m facing extreme culture shock here! And it is almost as bad as my shock when I first moved to LA; but people here are way too nice and I’m getting nervous.

When you walk into a restaurant, everyone greets you. The people waiting in line, the hostess, the servers at other tables. People walking by on the street. The housekeeper in the hotel. The guy on the next pump at the gas station…EVERYone! This is strange.

Also, everything is so cheap. The food is like $7 for a meal that I’m used to paying $13 for. And I swear the cook drives it through a tasty bucket of grease and sin before it hits my plate. Everything is delicious in the south/east. Besides the inexpensive food, there are free shuttles throughout the downtown areas during busy times. Really? The only thing LA seems to be handing out for free is STDs and sand on the beach.

So yesterday was this big, record-breaking St. Patrick’s Day pub crawl. And coincidentally, my day off. Winning. I paid my $20 for all-access to 60+ bars in the area and that’s where it all began! I’m used to seeing mobs of (white) people at Fair St. Louis during the 4th of July. But what I saw at the pub crawl was a new set of (white) people. They were wearing cowboy/cowgirl boots with their blue jean mini skirts. And yes, they cut their tshirts into belly shirts or halter tops. The guys were wearing suspenders with their shirts tucked into khaki shorts. Kate Spade bags hung from ladies’ arms. Bangs were swooped and hairsprayed across faces. Somewhere in the USA, all of this is fashionable.

The girls were kissing/dancing on each other like it was MTV’s Spring Break, and there were more redhead women than I’d ever seen in life. Is this what it means to be Irish?

After several (who’s keeping count?) $3 Bud Lights and the setting sun, I decided it was time to go while I could still stand on my own two feet. I guess now’s a good time to mention I had a record number of (white) guys approach me that day. One of them even took a picture with me. I’d like to think it’s because I am celebrity and I’m just-so-hott, but he probably needed evidence that a (black) girl actually danced with him. Thanks to Bud Light, he has some great pictures.

And in case you’re wondering, yes, they still play that one Petey Pablo song.

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